Saturday, March 6, 2010
Like children we often trip each other spiritually,
watch the fall and then run away and say "uh-ho you fell." We were experiencing a blackout accidental or enforced by the city, its all the same anyway.
Got me thinking about a time when I wanted to groom big cats in the wild, that was until I started throwing things with my mind. Kinda makes a girl begin to think.
But I digress. I'm going to need the protection that that ability brings, for I seek the Lost City of the Underworld tonight. Now where is that dog... let’s just hope that I find the murder weapon before they do. And I'm supposed to be at my nephew's basketball game. "Don't make enough time for family," they harp. But at those "get togethers" there seems to always be some sort of conflict going on behind the scenes.
All just skeletons in the closet, and I think best left there, so I intend not to do any "spring cleaning" of that sort. Who says it’s good for the conscious, it make me feel all icky, confrontation of that kind. I refuse to criticize my past, present or future. I figure that Jesus created glee only - so the negative perceptions can go hang. Even in this situation, no especially in this situation, I choose to be an optimist. Damn, this blackout will add trouble to my quest. How am I supposed to find it in the dark?
Ahhh, the dog's here under the roll away bed, along with that missing bag of two toke no joke. I'm sure glad I to have that around. We can use it in the circle tonight to make the visions stronger. That is if I make it back from the Lost City of the Underworld.
Here we are... the perfect place to start searching for my trail, the computer lab. Hmmm... I wonder how one loses a city. Wow that knock out blond is here again. Wish I could get the courage up to talk to her, I'd like to invite her to the circle. I sense she has a strong magic to tap into, even if she is unaware of it and of me. Now, Lost City of the Underworld...
A few hours later I glance over at the seat next to me and the person who had been there when I started was gone, replaced by a dread-locked queen. I wonder when my neighbor changed its form. No matter. Well so far, the search yields nothing. I will go to the circle and intend a vision to help lead me to the path I seek.
"And I said, 'there are only two things that you can do, shoot them or ignore them.'"
The members of the circle are lively tonight, I sure could use some of the energy off which they fly so high. Maybe there is just something in the air, something magical. "Everyone quite down, we need to get this circle under way. First, let me state that tonight's objectives must be kept firmly in mind as we try and use our collective power to unfold the visions that we seek. You all know why we do this. I don't have to remind you. One more thing, keep in mind the idea or symbol of a City that is lost and wants to be found, and a weapon fit for murder," I sit down in my place at the power position in the circle. I asked not for this position. It found me. They came to me to guide them. Sometimes I wish they hadn't because it's so difficult to care about anyone so much. And I have no experience at mothering.
I feel myself go into a trance almost immediately. The world as we know it drops away and I am floating within the sea of myself. This sea foams with ideas, ideas among which my answers bob. I see an abandoned place. Somewhere as if hidden in some other realm of existence, I spy it with moss build up on the cobble stone path which leads somewhere past a cracked and stained fountain. The place seems unkempt, as if no one has cared about it in decades. I wonder at this place and I recognize the weeping willow trees that pop up here and there along this path. I sure hope that cobbled stone pathway will lead me to my Shang-ri-la.
And I drown in a sea of symbols. Symbols with their past, present and future meanings all wrapped in the guise of a reality that is not quite the one that we collectively share in the physical, but rather one that we collectively share in the dimensions beyond time and space: the fifth, the sixth, the seventh... I am all of those dimensions expressing themselves in the physicality of me.
I come back down to earth not sure that any further information has been garnered, still, I feel quite at peace with the knowledge that no matter what, all is well and we only play this game here to learn what it means to be a part of something greater than yourself by choice rather than by design. The energy that builds itself during a shared vision session snakes here and there in the corner of my vision. There are more of them than I have ever seen before. I almost hear the crackle as it touches first one then another in the circle until it finally rest itself on me and enters. Up again I fly, away from the me bound by space time laws. And my spirit walks abroad.
I am awash in a sea of agony. I feel pain, pain and confusion.
Before me, beside me, and behind me, all in remain in darkness. Then through a haze I make out a City; or more correctly, a seeming shadow city, a "Something Not Quite There". I know I must look for the weapon, surely it is here, and the reasons or answers I seek for why all of this must occur when it did. For there must be some connection between the murder weapon and the occult; they would not have contacted me with questions about it unless it has some kind of magical significance or they think I committed the murder foul.
Why would they believe that I would do such at thing? Was telekinesis involved in the murder? If that were the case why didn't they just arrest me?
Then I can't even think to myself. I just feel, afraid, exhilarated, and I just wish the other shoe would drop right on the head of my answers!
My spirit aches; I feel a scream as well as hear it with my spiritual ears. Who screams and why won’t they stop? And the pain it near rips me in two as the scream intensifies. I'm nauseous, the city slips away and I wake before I have even begun to explore the hidden city for the treasures I desire to find.
"Gina! Are you okay?" I hear this from far away as I look up into the eyes of young chuck, one of the newest recruits into the circle. I realize that I am looking up at him from my spot laying on the ground. Funny, I don't recall lying down, yet somehow here I am. I also cannot remember, for the life of me, any of the vision. All I recall is the pain... well, that, and the screaming that almost deafened my spirit!
Guiltily, I glance at Chuck then the others and become aware of the hand that he holds out as if to help me up from my inclined position. It embarrasses me that I have not even tried to a'right myself. But I am still cloudy and confused. Why can't I remember the vision? I know I discovered the city, so I'll just have to do it again, after I have some recuperation, hopefully without all the pain and screaming this time.
"Okay, Chuck...all of you, begin to pass the talking rock from the very newest member to the very oldest member this time. I want to feel the sensations of the fresh blood initiates before the elders of the circle begin with their visions. They might step on the visions of the newer members and make them feel less helpful for their own lack of understanding and insight. Without our influence felt their visions can come to us in a pure light, open for all to interpret with their inner knowings."
I rise to my feet, not with Chuck's helping hand, but instead with my mind, gently levitating upwards. I laugh, softly as the young caramel colored man gasp out loud at my show of power. I did it truly without thought, now in teaching mode, at once instructing and listening, discovering and learning from my "pupils" as well.